Oct

1

Bi Girls Need to Practice Extra, Extra Safe Sex

Filed Under Bisexuality, Sex and Sexuality | Leave a Comment

I just read No, Not All Bi Women Love Threesomes: Silly Myths About Women and Bisexuality. I’m guessing the writer isn’t bisexual, and if she is, she’s not as informed about bisexuality as she thinks she is. I’ve highlighted the parts that raised an eyebrow in bold – and added my own sidebar comments in italics:

As a bisexual in the dating world, you’ll need to be extra careful to practice safer sex. [hunny, everyone needs to be extra careful and practice safer sex]. Consider keeping a sex kit in your bag — there’s nothing hotter than a lady who knows how to take care of herself and her partner, and you’ll score points if you’re the thoughtful one who brings along a tasty vanilla-flavored dental dam. A pair of latex rubber gloves (available at any grocery store) will provide protection for vaginal or anal play — pair them with lube to make sure things go smoothly. Water-based lubes like Liquid Silk will provide natural-feeling wetness without damaging the latex — very important, especially for anal play. Condoms, of course, should also be in your kit: the Durex Pleasure Pack includes a variety of sensations to try. Finally, consider your container. Latex can be damaged by friction, so dropping a dental dam into your purse [lots of bisexual females don't even carry a purse. Ever seen a butch bisexual? I have!] or tucking a condom into your pocket can do more harm than good. A Just In Case hard-sided container will keep your latex pristine (and discreet — you don’t want a dental dam falling out of your purse [there's that purse again!] while you’re reaching for your wallet!). Finally, if you’re using a dildo, vibrator or other toys, be careful to clean them thoroughly, since bodily fluids can carry all sorts of unpleasant viruses. It’s always safest to keep your toys separate — one dildo per person, please.

After reading this article, I got the feeling the writer assumes all bisexual women are traditionally feminine women who carry purses. And that, my dear readers, isn’t always true.

Another thing naggin’ me: I’m wondering why the writer has emphasized that bisexuals need to be extra careful and practice safer sex. Is that based on the assumption that bi women are promiscuous whores who run around bangin’ anybody and everybody? Maybe I’m reading too much into this article, but I’m guessing I’m not the only one who noticed these little details.

Upon further reflection, it appears the article is more of a marketing piece for various bi-related web sites – and less of a sincere attempt to tackle stereotypes about bisexuals.

Thoughts?

Aug

26

Gay Dating Site Billboard Ad Too Much?

Filed Under Gays, Marketing, Sex and Sexuality | 7 Comments

A Twitter follower just pointed me to this billboard ad in Los Angeles:

Some of the comments posted about this picture are a bit juvenile and homophobic, like “Come to philly man..we dont play that homo shyt out here..100% real.. ” or “That kind of shit do not need to be on a big ass billboard.”

You have to hand it to ManHunt, that’s very bold. A blatantly homosexual ad hanging up in what appears to be a very busy area of town.

From the comments I’ve seen, I’m guessing most people would be okay with this ad if it celebrated straight male sexuality. For example, if that ad featured a straight couple with the slogan “Last night was hot,” none of those juvenile homophobes would have a problem with it. If that same billboard was a Viagra ad that featured a straight couple and used the slogan “Last night could have been hot,” none of those juvenile homophobe pricks would have a problem with the ad. I’m also willing to bet if that ad featured a lesbian couple using the same slogan “Last night was hot,” none of those juvenile jerks would have a problem with the ad; instead, they would be saying stupid shit like, “Why didn’t you call me so I could watch?”

Now, I’m sure some of the more conservative gays among us probably have a problem with the ad. They’re probably thinking, “That’s a bit too much” or “Why do gay people have to be so over-the-top with their sexuality?” And I’m sure there are both straight people and gay people who are bothered by sexually suggestive ads of any kind that are visible in places where children can see them.

What do you think? Is this billboard ad a bit too much?

Aug

18

New Anti-Gay Religious Organization Says Sexual Relationships Belong to Married Heterosexuals

Filed Under LGBT, Religion, Sex and Sexuality, WTF? | 5 Comments

On GayWallet.com this afternoon, I saw an ad for The Lighthouse Covenant, the newest anti-gay religious organization (like we needed another one, right?). I thought it was strange that the ad was running on a gay web site, so I clicked it. Here’s what I found:

If you affirm the following, you are welcome to partner with us:

We covenant to teach a high view of Scripture. We trust the Bible as the only final authority for all aspects of life.

We affirm an aggressive, positive stance on kingdom expansion and congregational growth.

We choose to advance the use of all spiritual gifts through unleashing the priesthood of all believers.

We teach and practice that a full sexual relationship belongs exclusively within the biblical boundaries of a publicly committed marriage between one man and one woman.

We believe that mission and ministry is best accomplished within the context of congregations. Facilitating that mission and ministry should be the central focus of all expressions of the church.

I was so tempted to encourage GayWallet.com members to click on that ad just to blow the organization’s daily Adwords budget, but I opted to block the site instead. After blocking the site, I went back to see if they’re much of a threat. They’re not – at least not right now. It looks like a fairly new organization designed specifically to encourage its members to stand against gay rights issues. They made a rather lame (and confusing attempt) to justify point 4 in their mission statement:

Why do you make #4 a point? The rest sounds so missional. This sounds legalistic.

Answer: Every generation has its defining issue. In 1860, you had to say were you stand on slavery. Someday the sexuality issue will go away and there will be another defining issue. Clarity on the defining issue of the day frees a group up to do other things. Un-clarity leads to yet another round of discussion and lack of focus, therefore, on mission. It is ironic but true that clarity on divisive issues leads to less focus on them.

Anybody else confused with all that babble?

Perhaps The Lighthouse Convenant wants to take over as the new, younger generation of those old folks in the anti-gay religious organization AFA.

Jul

8

Queer Musician Erin McKeown on SistersTalk Radio

Filed Under Lesbian Podcast, Music, Sex and Sexuality | Leave a Comment

Tonight on SistersTalk Radio, we interviewed lesbian queer musician Erin McKeown.

From elegant pop to balls-out rock, sweet electronics to witty swing, Erin McKeown has packed a ton of music into a substantial career. With 6 albums, 2 EPs, and numerous soundtracks and compilations to her credit, the 31-year-old songwriter, multi-instrumentalist, and producer hasn’t stopped for a breather in the last 10 years. Along the way she has averaged 200 shows a year and garnered the praise of fans and critics alike.

Hear Erin discuss:

*Her musical influences
*Her career – from Junior year of high school to today
*Her creative fundraising efforts (she’s raising money to release her 7th album)
*Her song “To the Stars” (featured on 5.10 of The L Word)
*Her true sexual identity (she identifies as queer, not lesbian)
*Upcoming projects and performances

You’ll also get to hear two of Erin’s songs: You, Sailor (from the album Lafayette) and Air (from the album We Will Become Like Birds).

Download the podcast now.

Visit Erin’s web site and listen to her music.

Mar

13

Friday Night Without the Mrs

Filed Under Lesbians, Sex and Sexuality | 2 Comments

Holy dear gawd. I just sent this picture to the Mrs and told her “This is what’s keeping my attention – for now.”


image source

I’m about 4 days away from my Aunt Flo visiting and I have sex on the brain (actually, I’m thinking about sex, steak and chocolate).

I was a bit bothered by the borderline homophobic comments posted on the blog where I found this image:

Men and women are meant to come together to form the second complete unit – a duality or couple. In and of themselves men and women form their own individual dualities. But when two emerge, they form one entity, one unit – as well they keep the individual unit in tact. This new unit becomes the basic unit needed to produce or create children. The purpose of this unit, however, is not simply to create children, it is also to grow the original complete unit beyond itself

Umm, yeah. Annoying. But the picture is great!

Update: A Twitter response to this blog post has prompted the following question: Is this image art or porn? Or both?

Feb

24

Kama Sutra the Musical Brings Lesbian Sex to the Stage

Filed Under Entertainment, Lesbians, Music, Sex and Sexuality | 1 Comment

I’m not quite sure how I ended up on the mailing list for Kama Sutra the Musical: Vegas Bound … and Gagged, but it was one of the most interesting emails to land in my inbox in weeks.

Musical

We’re not dirty; we’re about sex.

Hear the new female-for-female anthem, When Pussies Collide and 12 more, like:

Martha Screw-it!
Baby, Won’t Ya Do Me Where the Sun Don’t Shine
Blame it on Cher

Created by Grammy-winner, Terry Abrahamson, the only person in history to have written for Oprah, Michael Jackson, Muddy Waters, Larry Flynt, Joan Jett and gay cable goddesses Sharon Gless and Pam Grier, as well as creating the first lesbian love song in film history.

I couldn’t resist checking out the web site. Some of the reviews will make ya raise an eyebrow:

“. . . it was great to finally see some real lesbian action on stage performed with real energy and passion that wasn’t about some male’s fantasy version of what lesbians should be. . . ”

“Aside from the fact that the parking sucks, the show got me and my date so horny that we did it in the car . . . ”

“. . . By the end of the show, you’ll be holding your partner tight, not just anxiously awaiting the bedroom, but also feeling comfortable about what happens in said bedroom . . . ”

The cast includes Dustin Hamilton (Dick), Buddy Reeder (The Swami), and Kendel Lester (Gina). The show is directed by Buddy Reeder.

Dates and Location:
Saturdays at 10:30pm
Davenport’s Piano Bar and Cabaret
1383 N. Milwaukee Avenue, Chicago

To reserve your tickets, call Davenport’s at 773-278-1830

Show ends March 28, 2009.

Feb

11

Gay Sex Video Provider to Drop Bareback Titles

Filed Under Entertainment, Gays, Movies, Sex and Sexuality | Leave a Comment

AdamMale.com, the most recognized gay sex toy and gay sex video site on the web is taking a bold stand to promote safe gay sex by dropping bareback titles from its product line.

“We originally started selling modern bareback sex video titles in 2006 because it seemed our customers were demanding it,” said Molly Fisher, Director of ECommerce for AdamMale.com “It never made sense within the standards we set for our brand to sell videos that glamorize unsafe sex practices.”

“Additionally, HIV/AIDS prevention through condom use has become an easy practice in modern gay adult sex films and we feel there is no reason to continue to put gay adult film stars at risk. We would like to apologize publicly to the gay community and gay sex industry for what was clearly a misstep in the history of our company. AdamMale will continue to be an organization that actively encourages fun, safe sex through its charitable contributions, its products, and its marketing.”

Founded in 1997, Adam Male is a subsidiary of Adam and Eve and distributes gay sex toys, gay sex videos, and sex accessories for gay men. A portion of each sale made at Adam Male goes to charities including those that promote HIV prevention and safe sex education.

Feb

2

Obama Never Asked Anybody to Get Naked

Filed Under LGBT, Politics, Sex and Sexuality | 3 Comments

One of the things I dislike about the gay club scene is that people assume that gay bars are where you can go to fuck and suck in public. Last year, I watched a straight girl (for about 10 seconds!) give her man a blowjob on the dance floor at a gay bar in Rockford, IL. No one seemed to mind until I called foul. The couple wasn’t asked to leave, even though public nudity and public sexual acts are against the law in Illinois. Needless to say, I don’t frequent that establishment anymore.

Today, I received a press release that reminded me of that nasty gay bar in Rockford:

Chicago Takes Off – Bar-lesque Competition is the first of its kind online event where Chicago bartenders are competing to become exposed, virtually. This is the brainchild of a local group of volunteers looking for new ideas on how to raise money and awareness for popular annual revue-show, Chicago Takes Off, benefiting Test Positive Aware Network (TPAN).

“I have never had so many people remark how proud they are of me just for getting naked,” says lead bartender, Rick. Bartenders from popular Chicago watering holes are featured in the online contest that runs through Feb. 28. “I had several of my regulars stumble onto the Bar-lesque site totally unbeknownst to me and they donated anonymously, but later left notes with their coffee orders,” says Jennings, an aspiring performer, part-time shot boy, and part-time coffee barista. “I’m beginning to feel more and more competitive about wanting to get enough donations so I can be shown in a naughtier photo,” adding, “I’m usually much more modest, but I wanna win!”

Umm, yeah. If that works for you, knock yourself out.

I suppose it’s a great way to raise money for charity. Sex sells, right? Interestingly enough, the creative minds behind this fundraising gimmick are claiming it was inspired by President Obama’s call to service. I don’t remember President Obama ever asking anyone to get naked to raise money for charity, although I suppose it’s possible he did and I just missed it.

Jan

28

More Obama Babies Coming Soon?

Filed Under Barack Obama, Blogging, Politics, Sex and Sexuality | 1 Comment

We just finished our latest edition of the Bloggers You Should Know Series on SistersTalk Radio. Our guest tonight was Deb, author of the blog DebontheRocks.com: a blog about life, pop culture, sex, relationships, and politics with a satirical focus. She’s also a lesbian with two teenagers. She’s passionate about blogging, 2.0 life, and finding the next best thing.

The highlight of tonight’s show was Deb’s commentary on the Obamas breakin’ in every room of the White House. We wonder if we’ll see a whole buncha new Obama babies pretty soon.

You might also like Deb’s commentary about Rachel Maddow’s girlfriend. I thought it was a hoot.

Deb’s presenting at BlogHer 09 in Chicago, IL. She would love to see more queer women join her there. Contact her for more information. And by the way, I do plan to attend BlogHer this year.

Listen to the show now, or download the podcast and listen later.

Join us Sunday, Feb. 1 when we talk to lesbian funny lady Vickie Shaw.

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